英文简历中不该出现的话
<P> <STRONG>致命的大错</STRONG> </P>
<P> "Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10." </P>
<P> "Qualifications: No education or experience." </P>
<P> "I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy." </P>
<P> "My compensation should be at least equal to my age." </P>
<P> "Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC." </P>
<P> "Fired because I fought for lower pay." </P>
<P> "Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 65" . </P>
<P> "Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date." </P>
<P> "Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near." </P>
<P> "Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia. I prefer to elaborate privately." </P>
<P> <STRONG>打字错误与语法错误</STRONG> </P>
<P> "Here are my qualifications for you to overlook." </P>
<P> "Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer." </P>
<P> "I am a rabid typist." </P>
<P> "Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981." </P>
<P> "After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work." </P>
<P> "Accounting cleric." </P>
<P> "As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments." </P>
<P> "Suspected to graduate earlynce analyzing investments." </P>
<P> "Suspected to graduate early next year." </P>
<P> "Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets." </P>
<P> "Proven ability to track down and correct erors." </P>
<P> "Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department." </P>
<P> "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details." </P>
<P> "Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school." </P>
<P> <STRONG> 不应有的幽默</STRONG> </P>
<P> "Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house." </P>
<P> "Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting." (Translation: Short-order cook.) </P>
<P> "But wait...theres more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing that is second nature." </P>
<P> "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse." </P>
<P> "My fortune cookie said, Your next interview will result in a job-and I like your company in particular." </P>
<P> "Title: Another resume from the Profiles in Excellence series." </P>
<P> "Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it." </P>
<P> "Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks." </P>
<P> "Lets meet so you can ooh and ahh over my experience." </P>